Gratitude.

In an attempt to shift focus from situations in my life I struggle with and/or have no control over, I'm going to today, focus on things I'm grateful for.
This is a common thread in religion.
"Count your blessings"
The effort this takes varies day by day.
When it's sunny, work is productive, and the birds are singing, it's easy to be grateful and show gratitude for the positive things in our life.
It's almost as if, when the sun is out, it makes our internal perspective shine that much brighter. The physical effects the visceral.
I always understood why ancient civilizations worshipped the sun, or sun gods.
Sol, Mithra etc...

What about when the day wasn't so good?
Our boss beat us down, our friends cancelled on us, our family was inconsiderate, the day was cold and dreary...

Maybe nothing "bad" even happened.
We're just soaked to the bone in apathy.
Life's uncertainties, like a petulant child, yank on our arms and hands, pulling down. Nagging. Ripping our sleeves.
Incessant and unforgiving.

Maybe we no longer have something we once had.
Something that brought us joy and centered us.

Now it's just me.

Sure, I like me.
Right?

How easy is it to show gratitude during these moments?
Because it's in these moments, feeling gratitude, is most important.

Gratitude doesn't come as easy as grumbling does. But when you begin putting forth intentional effort to give attention to things you're thankful for, it has a magnetizing power.

I never thought of myself as a grumbler.
Until I realized that just because I don't often vocalize negativity, didn't mean I never harbored it.

It's easy to see things you wish were different.
Things you have no control over.
Things that cause pain.
Because pain is louder than contentment.
Pain is the oboe of emotions.
It's not booming loud, but it's nagging and nasal and it demands your attention. (Ha)

So while we allow pain to exist.
We don't give it any more attention than it deserves.
See it and let it pass.
Suffering does serve a purpose. Without suffering, one could argue, joy would not even exist.

Let us instead think of things we are grateful for.
Commit to doing this everyday.
In the morning. Or maybe in bed before bed. Driving to work perhaps.

What am I grateful for?
I'm grateful for my mother. She'll drop everything and come see me if I need her. She makes me laugh and grit my teeth. I'm grateful I have her determined and hardworking genes.
I'm grateful for my father, who is the most calm, mild and deeply compassionate person I know. He doesn't speak much, because still waters run deep. Our bond is unlike any other, and he'll let me hug him indefinitely without pulling away.
I'm grateful for my younger brother who I can be completely and utterly unedited with and I trust more than anyone in the world. His heart is the purest I know.
I'm grateful for my sister who makes me laugh and I can pour my heart out to her and always be met with camaraderie and a kindred heart.
I'm grateful I have a friend I can call or text at all hours and always be met with compassion and calm understanding and non judgment.
This person will send me random texts and emails telling me I'm special. They've cried with me and held my hand during hard times.
I'm grateful I have another friend who is so intuitive, they'll sense when I need to talk or even invite me over at the drop of a hat for a good purging. She doesn't indulge my emotions but tells me exactly what I need to hear, even when I don't want to.
I'm grateful today for the sun shining.
I'm grateful for the roof over my head and my semi warm apartment.
I'm grateful for food in my belly.
I'm grateful for writing.
I'm grateful for my job and hilarious co-workers.
I'm grateful for music, my therapy. Music is always there for me. A constant source of inspiration and mood elevation.
I'm grateful for my comfortable bed.
I'm grateful for nature. Being able to be immersed in nature, breathe fresh air, feel the sun.
I'm grateful for candles for making my studio apartment feel more like home:)

That came easier than I thought.
You should try it:)

Let us make an honest effort everyday, to mentally ponder the good things we have.
I think you'll be surprised how they pour out.